April 2008 Archives
Oh, I blew it last week! I feel bad about it - and for those who know and love me - you know am an opinionated gal, no doubt. But I really strive to reserve judgment about people's choices - and for the most part, especially professionally, I think I do a good job!
Not last Tuesday, however.
Someone asked me about circumcision - in particular how to talk to her son about why his penis is different from his circumcised dad's and how to keep things clean, etc.
I told her to be honest with her boy, tell him why his dad's penis looks different - because it's intact! And here's where I headed over the judgmental edge...I talked about how circumcision is not necessary, it's mean, pointless and unfair. I didn't quite use those words, but close enough.
Whoops!
I managed to offend a Jewish mom who chose to circumcise her son - for religous reasons. She kindly pointed out to me that I was being judgmental and not everyone circumcises "so they can look like Daddy" and other non-health or non-religious reasons.
She said she wanted her son to feel good about his body - circumcision and all - and if he hears about how wrong being circumcised is, well, he might feel bad about his body.
Ug. She's right and the last thing we need is yet another reason to feel bad about our bodies. Any of us - circumcised or not - have the right to be accepted for who we are, foreskin or no.
I still think circumcision is a bad idea, in particular if it is treated as though it is no big deal - "like clipping a fingernail." However, it really is more important for me to respect parents' choices, even if I don't agree with them, than to get on my soap box and prove myself right.
True confessions
I’m just realizing that I am remiss in cracking open a sex book with M! It’s been ages since we read It’s So Amazing together. I bet he understands more now that he’s seven – it’ll be interesting to hear his questions and comments and gage my own reactions!
We also need to put parental controls in place on our computer downstairs since M is now getting online and playing some games. Mind you, they are at www.playmobil.com so mostly harmless, but as Kerry says, these are “gateway video games” and the internet is a slippery slope!
I find it strange to have my gentle kid playing semi-violent video games and his glee at killing all the octopuses or whatever is keeping him from his pirate treasure. He’ll come running upstairs to inform us (read, Kerry) “You’ll never believe me! Nope, you won’t! I just killed that gladiator – the one with the rolling thing – and MOVED UP!”
What are we supposed to say in response to that? “Great, dear, glad your killing skills are improving!” or in my best Positive Discipline way, “You worked hard to kill that guy! How do you feel?” Yikes!
Maybe just a non-committal, “Hmmm” will do the trick.
